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Cant think at this moment in time….the forty page case I have to read is not going well…..and all I wanna do is text Lemay. Yes, we’re in another argument, but he “broke up” with me on Sunday. And we have not spoken since then. I have been numb all week, not knowing what to do. I have been trying to be strong and not text him, so far I have been successful. I want him to come back to me, to text me first, to make the first move again. We both work tomorrow, so I guess its judgement day…..ggggrrrrrr……this is hard :( I try to keep busy and keep my mind off of him, but it does not work. Love sucks, I wish I could make it right once more. Maybe that chance is gone, because like always he has the best timing in killing my ideas?? We will see how tomorrow goes. 

Almost the end of summer!!!!!


Anyways, this summer has not gone according to my plan. I thought that with being single, I would be out with friends all the time and enjoying the nice weather and meeting a few cuties if ya know what I mean ;) But school got really busy and I studied MY ASS OFF for finals (which paid off btw :D ) and worked weekends. Went to the beach like three times this summer ( OMG THAT SUCKS!!! ), and also went to the states twice. I swear I got no life lol, and did absolutely nothing with friends. Nothing at all….

Got a tan ;) And oiooohhhhhh I forgot to mention Spencer Singer. He is this guy that I like. Yes, I like a guy. Never thought I would feel the feeling of a crush again lol. He works as a loss prevention officer for The Overwaitea Food Group, and is soooooo cute omg. I met him in January, and we had a connection. Well, on Saturday August 20, he worked, and we talked a lot, and Noor (my friend from work) told him he had a secret admirer, and eventually he figured it out that it was me. And hes liked me for the longest time as well!!!! He got my number, and we hit it off. A few days later, he mentions his ex, and how she wants him back and shit. Well I gave up on him and wanting to date him. Cried the rest of the day. Mind you this was at work and I felt like the worlds biggest fool :( I told Noor, and she basically told me, she is your competition now. You are beautiful, fun, sweet, and mysterious. Make him fall hard for you. Make him want to be with you. So now that is my current challenge. But he is quite busy all the time. He works like 32 hours a week, and is entering third year at the University of Fraser Valley. He is studying criminology and plans on becoming a cop in the future, like his parents. He resides in Port Kells. And did I mention he is SOOOOOOOO CUTE?!?!?!????? I wish he had fb or something, so I could have a picture to look at. 

But the current challenge : Make Spencer Singer slowly fall for me over the next four months ;) and realize I am perfect for him.

Last day of First Year

OMG TOMORROW IS MY LAST DAY OF FIRST YEAR!!!!! Cant wait till its over actually :P Its been a long semester. Hopefully the next one will be better. Objective: find a great guy who is different from all the others……hmmmm……sounds hard…..but will try :) Message me if you read this ;) 

Sunday night blues

Totally unfocused now……like always, has been an all over the place day. I responded to the ex’s email, and he answered me back, with bullshit answers. But anyways, just taking a break from ACCT 3510, reviewing Chapter 13. My brain feels like its melting omg!!! Thats how much I have been reviewing it. OMG I HAVE TO STILL PICK A TOPIC FOR NEXT WEEK’S PRESENTATION!!! I better google that now…hopefully I will have an update soon with my chosen topic :)

Today is a weird day

Well, today, as explained by the title, is a weird day. Ive been having a few of these lately….more and more often now. Stuck on my report so I am taking a little break. The ex wont leave my head, which is strange cuz I dont want to be with him, and I know we would never work together unless we changed. Which is weird because as much as I hate him, i love him soooo much more now that I am not with him. I have this weird feeling that we are going to reconnect one day and be together, when we are settled and are working and are much older. We will get married and have kids and will live happily ever after. I dont know why I think this!!!! Hmm…. does he think this? I wonder, but right now, as the two people we currently are, we could never work, hence the past ten months of unhappiness and constant arguments. This is a good thing, me being single and focusing on myself. I am (slowly) becoming someone I have been dreaming about for the last while. I am meeting people and getting out of my shell ( very slowly but surely :P ) I am not ready to date or get into anything serious for a while to come now, as its been almost two months of breaking up with him. But I know someone is out there, whether its him or another person. Anyways, this will be a good summer, filled with busy study sessions, long work days, and extreme fun days with friends and family and the goergous sunshine and my new bathing suit :) A salut to summertime : I love you and we will be together forever (or maybe that was meant for someone else :o) Back to my report…..

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